I DON’T KNOW IF YOU HAVE HEARD….
But curiosity fucking killed the cat…so there is definitely a point where you might want to take into consideration that no matter the answer you seek…you might be extremely more well off without it.
Sometimes without you realizing…….
As fearful as you are of it, the “unknown” has plenty of instances in which it offers more comfort or warmth than the alternative.
I’m sure you are familiar with the saying “ignorance is bliss?”
That is because as powerful knowledge has proven to be…knowledge is most always accompanied by the burden of how it effects us..by what it makes us feel.
Answers can be more complicated than the questions in which inspired them. Maybe trying to embrace the strange peace in not knowing is a risk worth taking.